Wal-Mart *

New logo

New logo

Old logo

Old logo

I don’t know if you noticed, but Wal-Mart changed their logo.  I know I didn’t notice until we were driving to the dollar store (the only store in three counties with products inferior to Wal-Mart’s) and The Wife says, “Hey, they repainted the front of Wal-Mart.”  I think she only noticed because that’s where we got our dog.

I also noticed the Wal-Mart now has an asterisk after their name.  It resembles a star, but I think we all know that it simply means, “See below for details.”

What are they trying to tell us?  Do you think, like the Bush Administration, they’re getting closer and closer to telling us they’re screwing us over because they know there’s nothing we can do about it?  Do you think they’re getting closer and closer to this:

Wal-Mart *

Save money.  Live better.



*No matter what.  We have killed, enslaved, run communities into the ground, and have renounced all religion in order to achieve a nickel’s savings on a Wii.  You will never get a good piece of fruit.  Most people who work here are otherwise unemployable.  We allow the morbidly obese and hours-old newborns to roam freely.  We have child seats in the stalls so your children are trapped to enjoy your ass-waft.  We have 30 check-out lanes, but will never open more than two.  Much like air travel, shopping here is a terribly frustrating, baffling ordeal.


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