Insurance Woes

Toward the beginning of this year, a friend of mine told me about an insurance company that could save me some money.  I decided to check them out.  They gave me the runaround (to see how much of a runaround, read my article “Bad at Jobs”) so I decided to not partake in their ridiculousness.

During this time, back in January or February, my current insurance company – because they knew I was shopping around – came up with this brilliant plan: if I put both cars and the house under one policy, I’ll save some money.  Because I’m an idiot, I thought all that stuff was already under one policy; I told them to do it.

On Friday I got a bill from them for a ’98 Grand Am.  I haven’t owned that car since the Malibu came into being.  When I called them on it, they said they had no idea that I traded one car in for another (apparently, that type of thing is unheard of).  They also had no idea that The Wife and I are married and should have everything under one policy.


The metaphor of "Umbrella" insurance is that it will protect you from the rain. It will now, however, protect you from the bullshit.


Keep in mind, that was their idea.

I just got back from their office and although the lady I talked to was very nice about the whole thing, this is exactly what I said:

Me: “I’m not mad at you, and try not to take this the wrong way, but from what I understand, this is not a difficult job.”  She looked a little put off by this so I reiterated, “Again, I’m not talking about your job personally.  I’m talking about an insurer.  You basically take my money, and then, if I ever need it, you give it back.  This is very simple.  I’m not insuring something that I don’t own; I would like my money back from the months I did insure it and didn’t own it.”

She nodded and said something like “We can do that.  Absolutely.”

I continued, “Also, I would like everything that you insure – everything that sits overnight at my address – to be under one policy in order to save paperwork and headaches.  I would think your company would want this too.”

She repeated: “We can do that too.  Sure.”

“Now, could you write down for me that we had this conversation and these are the steps that are going to happen because this is not the first time I’ve come down here to discuss something like this, but I would like it to be the last.  So could you put that I will receive a full refund for the 6 months I paid for a car I didn’t own, and that all three of my current policies will be merged into one?”

She said, “If you have your policy with you sir, I can show you where…”

I stopped her and said, “I’m glad that you’re an expert at the language of this policy.  But I’m asking you to actually follow through on it.  Not just talk about it.

She responded with, “If you’d like, I can print you out a copy of the policy and highlight the relevant parts…”

Again, I stopped her, “I’m asking you to do something very simple: 1) Give me my money back for something I didn’t need to pay for and 2) Merge all of the money I pay you into one bill.”

“So, you want me to write all that down or…?”

“Tell you what.  When is this all going to take effect?”

“The refund will take a few weeks and the merging will take place on 11/9, when your bill is due.”

“OK.  I’m going to call you on 11/9.  If this isn’t straightened out, I would also like to talk to your boss.”

What do you think?  Was I dickish or polite without being dickish?


2 Responses

  1. Dickish.

  2. We got one vote for “dickish”! Anyone else?

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