Why Won’t You Take My Money?

Just about everything is out of boxes.  I’ll post pictures soon (I might even have a little party where you can come into my house, use the super-expensive sewer system, draw wangs on the chalkboard wall and use the handrail-on-a-handrail to walk out to the back yard).  I do have one complaint:

The building of this house has furthered my point of businesses refusing to take my money.

Instead of putting my laundry room in the basement (even though everyone I talked to said I should; what is it with you people putting expensive appliances in hard-to-reach places?  It’d be like putting the sub-zero freezer right underneath the toilet for convenience), I put it on the top floor – the floor with all the bedrooms and bathrooms.  I just designed a little 3’x5’ closet where I could store a washer and dryer.  No real plans for it except “washer on the left, dryer on the right.”  So the vent guys game in and made a vent about where the dryer will be and the plumbing guys came in and put some pipes about where the washer would be; they just guessed because there was no concrete plan about anything.

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This is a periscope vent.  They weight nothing and they’re not hard to make.  On sale now for $80

Turns out the vent is about three inches from the dryer exhaust.  That sounds like a good thing, but it is not.  They don’t make easily bendable metal tubes that can go 180 degrees in three inches.  Except online.  They have “periscope vents” online.  I searched around, found some favorable reviews at Sears, and decided to call them.

 

They gave me a quick multiple-choice quiz: a) $60 to send it to me next week, b) $60 to send it to the store next week, c) $80 to send it to me tomorrow, d) hang up and order online for $15.  I chose d) and went to the store two days later.

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Spending more than 30 minutes per month in Taco Bell or Sears will dramatically affect your lifespan.

Picking stuff up at Sears is supposed to be TacoBell-like in its fluidity (and, I later learned, is their ability to make fluid come out of orifices that don’t normal leak).  They guarantee your order will be to you in five minutes or less.  They even have a board with a timer.  Mine took about an hour.  Or, rather, it would have if they didn’t lose it.

 

“But I got an email.”

“But I got a phone call”

“But the guy said he had it”

“But the timer stopped at four minutes”

These are all irrelevant responses to “We can’t seem to find the part you’ve been waiting 55 minutes for.”  Just because the computer, another computer, two guys, and a timer said something was in-stock, it doesn’t mean that something is in stock.

So after waiting an hour with Quinford, I walked the store, found one in stock (which they said they didn’t have), paid for it and left.  On the way home they called to tell me they found one by the dryers!  Shocked, I told them it’s no wonder they’re going out of business.

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