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This is normally a comic-book related site.  Not right now, though.

I decided to build a house.  That doesn’t mean I’m shopping around for real estate.  I’m going to design, contract, and build a house all on my own.  This means I have to study building codes and learn about permits and do a lot of research on furnace efficiency and r-value and carpet fiber and refrigerators and wind direction and toilet height and backsplashes… I simply won’t have time for Tiny Life any time soon.

So, probably through 2015, the majority of these posts will be about building a house.  And possibly about living with the In-Laws while the house is built.

House Complete Part the Fifth

Today’s focus: unclassifiable spaces

To most people, these spots are not interesting.  These are the places where mops are kept and where winter coats are stored and where The Wife’s life-sized Care Bear costume stays.

You probably don’t care, but I find these spaces pretty fascinating.  As the designer of the house, these spaces are necessary and, in many cases, accidental.

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This is the entryway.  I’ve never lived in a place with an entryway.  The Wife likes to call it a mudroom.  I’ve never lived in a place with a mudroom.  I call it an atrium.  I’ve lived in several places with an atrium.  To the right of the entryway is…

 

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… a place for hanging things. Most houses have this, but this alcove is out of the way and perfectly matches everything in the house.  Like a Stepford Wife.  To the left is…

 

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…the garage.  I’ve never had a garage before, so I have no idea what to do with it except put things in it.  It’s like I’m just learning how to date.

 

 

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At the top of the stairs, all the way to the end you’ll find a closet.  Originally it was a window (because this side of the house has few windows), but the more I thought about my daughters showering and then walking to their room naked, the more I thought that I shouldn’t have a five-foot window in the hallway.  It was changed to a closet, which is where we keep the bags, vacuum, and other miscellanea that we want to keep, but only use once a year (like my self-confidence, and a travel-charger) 

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Also upstairs is the laundry closet.  People kept objecting to me putting the clothes washer beside the clothes closets and adjacent to the clothes wearers once they get declothed. 

 

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Above the stairs to the basement is a small 4x4x8 closet.  It is hard-to-reach for a reason: it’s full of things that I should probably throw away but can’t.  Like my Stan Lee autographed X-Men #1 (not the original, the highest-selling comic in history.  The one that’s worth $2.50), The Wife’s VHS copies of The X-Files, and yearbooks from middle school (unfortunately, I look exactly the same).

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This is my basement storage area.  It’s walled off and contains four eight-foot shelves and an under-the-stairs storage area. 

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This is my basement non-storage area.  Right now it resembled the other area.  Eventually I’ll change it to an art studio and finish the third book of Tiny Life.  Or maybe I’ll put a projector down here and watch The Adventures of Brisco County Jr.  Whatever’s easier. 

 

 

Non-Sequitur

I never heard “One Night in Bangkok” until today.

House Complete Part the Fourth

Today’s focus: my room

I was told by a man who owns a condo that this room is not big enough because of resale value.  He’s able to critique me, yet unable to see the irony of the words “resale”, “value” and “condo”.

This is mine.  Everything fits exactly where it’s supposed to.  Even my smug sense of personal satisfaction has a drawer. 

House Complete Part the Third

Today’s focus: kids’ rooms

This is the closet in their playroom.   Yes, Seinfeld Scene-It is among their favorite games.  It’s so cute when the three-year-old talks about shrinkage. 


This is The Professor’s room.  She enjoys Little People, Frozen, and humid air.  Also, her mattress is too small for her bed, so I made a “rail” to pretend I didn’t buy the wrong size bed-frame.

  

This is Lemon’s room.  She enjoys Care Bears, all things Disney, and sweating at night.  She has a four-foot-tall loft-bed; underneath it, from the floor to the mattress, is a mound of stuffed animals. 


This is the kids’ bathroom.  Somehow, as girls, they often miss the toilet. 

 

Non-Sequitur

My kids have three small stuffed horses that they’ve named:

  1. Neigh-Neigh
  2. Crackers
  3. Evil Santa

House Complete Part the Second

Today’s focus: the kitchen

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The view from the dining area: notice the “double-oven”?  The top one is actually a microwave!  I know!

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In addition to the classy bamboo fruit bowl, teak dining room table, and sustainable pine countertops, you’ll see a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles lunch bag atop the refrigerator.

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This is what I see when I walk in the house each day.  Except there’s usually glitter everywhere, a half-eaten bologna sandwich on the counter, and a stuffed animal with kool-aid stains shoved under a bowl.

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In the left cabinet is a very large food pantry.  In the right cabinet is a hidden dishwasher.  There are drawers everywhere instead of wasted-space door cabinetry.  Also, there is a clock on both the microwave and the oven; they are not synched exactly and it’s driving me insane.

House Complete

Since it took like two years to put together, I thought I’d spend a few days and revel in my accomplishment.  So, over the next few days, I’m going to be putting up a bunch of pictures separated by rooms.  Everything is pretty much done.

Today’s focus: the living room

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This is the living room/dining room.  Notice the classy futon frame and the large TV that somehow looks too small on that gigantic wall.  Also notice the patio furniture that we decided would make a good dining room set.

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This is a close-up of the dining room.  You’ll notice a lack of draperies and life in the plants.  They’ve been in a basement for 15 months; lay off.

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This is a closer look at the living room.  I’m supposed to have access to over 1500 channels through the wi-fi system I’ve set up.  But I don’t have internet, so instead I have a digital antenna where I’m able to watch four different PBSs.  Also, the couch is from 1977.  It’s the most comfortable place to sit on earth  (excluding Beanbag Island in the Philippians). 

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