This is normally a comic-book related site.  Not right now, though.

I decided to build a house.  That doesn’t mean I’m shopping around for real estate.  I’m going to design, contract, and build a house all on my own.  This means I have to study building codes and learn about permits and do a lot of research on furnace efficiency and r-value and carpet fiber and refrigerators and wind direction and toilet height and backsplashes… I simply won’t have time for Tiny Life any time soon.

So, probably through 2015, the majority of these posts will be about building a house.  And possibly about living with the In-Laws while the house is built.

A Quick Review of Suicide Squad (that points out something other reviews glossed over)


It looks like it’d be fun.  Look at all those colors.

After watching Suicide Squad (I didn’t plan on seeing it – I pride myself on identifying bad movies by their commercials – a friend of mine had a few hours away from the family and he likes anything Batman-related), I read a bunch of reviews to see if I was the only one who hated everything about it.  I was not.  The majority of the reviews talked about how the acting is bad, the dialogue is bad, the bad guys don’t seem to be all that bad, there are inexplicable music videos scattered throughout, Jared Leto as an awful Joker (I also read a lot of tangents about how Heath Ledger ruined any future Joker and how Leto should’ve been much better considering all the rumors about him being “in character” and using that as an excuse to be an asshole to his castmates), and the obvious attempts to “lighten it up” after the reviews of the history-will-show-that-it-is-preposterously-named Batman vs. Superman.  No one mentioned, though, the individual story arcs.

Good movies have a resolution of plot and a resolution of character: “we stopped the aliens and I regained my lost faith.”  OK movies have only a resolution of plot: “the aliens were going to invade, but we stopped them!”  Bad movies try to do both but accomplish neither.  That is Suicide Squad.


Here’s the plot: a witch is trying to destroy … something … with dancing and green lighting.  The dancing is stopped and the green lighting is stopped, but things are still destroyed (the plot is like Married Sex: the beginning is a little too quick and a little too awkward, the middle’s not as fun as it could be, and the ending is totally expected yet somehow disappointing).  I wasn’t surprised by lack of plot.  I was, however, surprised by each character’s “story” arc.

  • Deadshot: He gets caught by Batman at the beginning because he doesn’t want to kill someone in front of his daughter.  By the end, he finds the courage to do so.
  • Harley Quinn: At the beginning, she’s likes to swing on a bedsheet in a cage and antagonize the guards.  By the end, she likes to drink cappuccinos in a cage and antagonize the guards.
  • Rick Flag: He has a stupid name at the beginning and not one other character says so.  By the end, he is patriotic.
  • Captain Boomerang: He’s angry and in captivity at the beginning (presumably because he’s an expert at the world’s most useless weapon).  By the end, he’s angry and in captivity.
  • Killer Croc: When we first meet him, his only defining characteristic is that he’s ugly.  By the end we see that he finally understands the depths of the human heart.  I’m kidding; he continues to be ugly and that is all.
  • Diablo: At the beginning, he swears never to use his power after what he did to his own family.  By the end, he finds the courage to kill again.

From this episode description, I can see why they’d want to replicate this magical elixir.  

It’s almost like before production started, someone in power said, “This has to be like a TV show.  Everything is wrapped up by the time the credits roll and nothing can change.”  I’m thinking maybe the incomprehensible popularity of The Flash has somehow tainted DC’s movie outings.


The Angry Birds Movie

“Behind Blue Eyes” by Limp Bizkit is featured prominently in this 2016 release. 

End of review

If I Were You


Everyone I talk to envies this current generation of teens . They say, “Can you imagine being 16 nowadays?  You’re never bored because of the phone.  There’s a hookup culture where anyone humps anyone.  Everyone’s fat now, so the hottest hottie will get with the fattest fattie.  There’s good TV.  You have access to every song ever made for free.  Everyone is accepting of everyone else.  Plus the porn!  Porn everywhere!”  On the surface, I agree.  But that’s from my point of view, growing up in the 90s.  I can’t imagine growing up with that now.  I can’t imagine how that would change me.

I can’t imagine how I’d be affected believing that on-line life is just as (or more) important than actual life.

I can’t imagine how I’d be affected going through the hormones of adolescence with a masturbation machine in my pocket.

I can’t imagine how I’d be affected having 24-hour access to an unlimited number of friends, only to have no one get a hold of me.

I can’t imagine how I’d be affected knowing I could listen to any song at any time, but never listening to an entire album by anyone.

I can’t imagine how I’d be affected knowing that everyone I know eats fast food on a daily basis.

I can’t imagine how I’d be affected knowing that if I made fun of anyone, it’d be considered a hate crime.

I can’t imagine how I’d be affected knowing that I could learn anything I wanted without going to a class.

I can’t imagine how I’d be affected having 24-hour access to an unlimited number of girls, only to have no one get a hold of me.

I can’t imagine how I’d be affected having never known a “normal” winter or a “normal” summer.

I can’t imagine how I’d be affects by having a continual and constant distraction in my life.





I Finally Read Preacher


14-year-old me: “What if you only had a superpower when you humped a girl?”

I quit comics around the time the now-famous writers started working: Mark Waid, Brian Azzarello, Ed Brubaker, Brian Vaughn, Matt Fraction… People say I should read this guy’s Batman or this other guy’s Superman is something I’ve never seen before.  I’m not interested.  Even when my Assistant to the Traveling Secretary (we have the same taste) recommended an X-Men arc (who I normally love) written by Joss Whedon (who is – by all accounts – a terrific writer), I didn’t spend more than about 10 seconds before I said, “They really needed an ‘Astonishing X-Men’?”

I then heard that Garth Ennis has the same viewpoint. The best of the genre (practically-naked men looking angry) has been written.  So I decided to give Preacher a shot.


I gotta say, I think if I had read this when it came out, I might have stuck with comics a little longer. It’s a fun amalgamation of comic genres – western, sci-fi, horror, humor, romance – without being too much noir (I’ve never understood how “noir” is a genre; it’s code for a writer bad enough to use clichés but good enough to know they’re clichés).  I like the good guys, I like the bad guys, I like how there’s a history to the characters and I like how there’s a history to the mythology; when the reader stumbles across them, they didn’t suddenly come into existence.

However, with all the hype it’s gotten over the years, I think I expected a bit more from Preacher. All the characters speak with exactly the same cadence – black, white, gay, straight, men, women, good guys, bay guys, southerner, mid-westerner, New Yorker, German, Irish, guys from the 19th century, angels in heaven – they all say “Shite” and “Arshole” and “Boyo”.

Also, almost every situation the main characters find themselves in is because of circumstance. Tulip just happens to run into Cassidy, Jesse just happens to run into Tulip, they all just happen to run into DeSade… I know it’s part of the western genre as a “troubled town of the week”, but it gets pretty old pretty fast.

There’s also a few character flaws:

  • preacher-jesse-h_2016

    Not quite as good as Spiderman’s black costume, but close.

    Why is Jesse able to kick everyone’s ass? Yes, he had a shitty childhood, but he’s shown literally throwing people through walls.  Doesn’t this just make a low-grade superhero (with a preacher costume)?

  • Why is Tulip able to shoot everyone? Yes, her dad took her hunting when she was little but she botched her first paying gig as a hitman and she’s shown literally killing an entire platoon.  Doesn’t this just make her a low-grade superhero?
  • Why is Cassidy a vampire? Yes, I know he was bitten by one 100 years ago, but what purpose does it serve to the story that he can only be killed by prolonged exposure to sunlight?  Doesn’t this just make him a low-grade superhero?

Finally, one major plot hole in the conclusion of the series: God takes the baby/ghost/more-powerful-than-God-and-therefore-the-only-thing-God-is-afraid-of thing away from Jesse at the end of the series somehow and returns to heaven only to find the Saint of Killers ready to shoot Him, even though the Saint’s powers do not rival God’s.

Overall, a terrific series. I love Steve Dillon’s art – a classic UK style with a little mix of Art Adams and Barry Windsor-Smith thrown in.

Hopefully the TV show can fix some of the drawbacks of the comic (maybe Tulip is a successful hitman, Jesse has a long history of ass-kickin and Cassidy’s vampirism somehow fits into the plans of The Grail).

House Complete Final

In January I made a bunch of posts about my brand-new kick-ass house.  I had a post about the bedrooms and another about the kitchen and even one about closets and storage spaces.

Then I forgot to show the outside of it.


The deck is where bees fight spiders


I put a double-sliding door in the basement because I’m under the delusion that someone will come over, we’ll head out back to “get away from the wives” and they’ll say, “Hey!  a double-sliding door!”


It looks like a tall house, but that’s just because you’re so short.


Yes, that’s beige.  I always wanted a house that reminds me of a Tandy computer.


The garage door has windows so people can see that my garage is full of tools from other people’s garage sales. 



Why Flash?

I have a few friends who won’t shut up about The Flash being the best superhero show ever.  Every time I watch one I’m disappointed on a number of levels (everything from the acting, to the plot, to the names of the villains).  When I tell them this, they always say, “Oh, you just saw a bad one.  Last week’s was phenomenal.”

I purposefully missed the season finale here’s what I saw on my newsfeed today regarding a “shocking revelation”:

In Barry’s (Grant Gustin) bid to prevent Zoom (Teddy Sears) from destroying the multi-verse, the scarlet speedster created a time remnant of himself, which had the bonus of attracting Time Wraiths, who appeared to transform Zoom into the Black Flash, potentially adapting DC Comics’ seminal Flashpoint in season 3.


That sounds awful.  Awful, awful, awful.

So, my question is – and this is coming from someone who watched the entirety of Buffy the Vampire Slayer because he saw three good episodes (there are probably 15 good episodes of the entire series) – what episodes of The Flash should I watch?


What good can come from knocking on a bathroom stall door?